It's All Jaysa's Fault

Last summer I got a really short haircut I didn't like, but I loved the hair coloring the stylist did so I took a picture of it to show it in the future when changing stylists. I planned to keep the picture in my camera for future reference. This plan, as most other things in my life lately, did not work out.

About a month ago, I went with Bill while he got a haircut. "Well, I'll just get a cut myself" I thought. Never a good idea, but with the life I've been living lately, I should have know better. So I get a haircut from hell. A few days later I went to California, due to Tori's death, and didn't have time to correct it until a few weeks ago.

Well, long story short, in correcting it I ended up with a haircut much shorter than the one above. I also ended up with hair coloring a dark brownish black color because either the stylist wrote the coloring codes down wrong or they got the wrong card. Who knows... but my backup plan of showing the picture failed because Jaysa downloaded all my pictures for me while I was up there for Ben's birth (she thought 155 pictures in the camera said time to save to my computer) and automatically deleted them from my camera. So when I tried to show the stylist my picture in the camera, it was blank...which should have been a sign for me, but I ignored it and plowed ahead!

My hair was waaaaay too dark, so I tried to highlight it, but I bought the wrong kit (Frost and Tip instead of Frost and Glow...I'm not making this up, check the haircoloring isle) and the hook thingy in it kept bending after only getting the front section done. So I gave up and went with just a front section, but left it on waaaaay too long and the highlighted hair looked white-white. Not a good look. I ended up looking like Cruella DeVille from 1001 Dalmatians.

Bill swallowed hard when he saw it and couldn't even put his usual good spin on it...just stared.

Hmmm...how to fix? Buy some reddish dye and hope it lightens the whole mess? Nope, that didn't work.

Hmmmm...buy a Frost and Glow kit and highlight all over? Nope, that didn't work because I didn't highlight enough, but it is better than the Cruella look!

I am going to just leave it alone and let it grow and fade enough for another stab at it, but this time I'm going to go to the best stylist in town (name and number given me by Gail the realtor) and stick with her so she can read the card right in the future. Meanwhile, I'm blaming this all on Jaysa for deleting my picture.

Yes, I know the picture can be put back into the camera, but if I could have downloaded them in the first place I would know how to put them back...wouldn't I?????

Dee Misses Gammy

Recently Jaysa sent me an email titled "Dee misses Gammy" with the picture above attached. As much as she misses me, I miss her. Dee is just the kind of shit-disturbing type that I truly love. For instance, the first time Gampy and I visited after the kids got her, Dee wanted to sit on Gampy's lap some more, but Jaysa and Mike told her to leave him alone and shooed Dee away. Well, Dee went around to the back of the couch and, from a 4-legged flat foot position bounced over the couch and into Gampy's lap! Even Jaysa gave up trying to change Dee's mind about giving Gampy some love after that magnificent jump.

The following pictures will show you exactly why Sweet Dee misses her Gammy so much. And let me warn you before you visit them, Dee is a hard one to say "no" to!

After getting her bite, she lingered by my side, then let me know in several ways, like the one below where she moves close to me and stares longingly at my food, that she was more than ready for another bite.

It's A Wonderful Life...No Matter What Happens

Today life sent me a wake-up call in the form of a Dave Ramsey caller. Just when I blogged yesterday about all the shit that's been hitting my fan lately, a young guy calls Dave today in the 3rd hour and leaves everyone dumb-founded.

He called Dave to see if his "plan" is a good one as he wants to make sure his wife and kids are well cared for. Seems he a 27-year-old who married his wife early and joined the marines young, but has been listening to Dave for a long time and has set up a good life insurance policy and IRA, plus has quite a bit in savings. Altogether it came to over a million dollars.

He's been told by doctors that he has inoperable brain cancer. With treatment they can prolong his life, but only for a few years at most. He and his wife have chosen to not do any treatment and just to live what life they have left together as best they can.

Man, this young guy had me bawling so hard I could hardly see the road! He never lost his composure although Dave's voice cracked quite a few times. Dave agreed with everything he'd done except the young guy wanted to sell his house now and pay cash for a smaller home closer to their families in another part of Oklahoma. Dave suggested he should make sure his wife really wanted to move at this time when they had so little time left.

Of course it made me think of the most traumatic thing that's happened to me lately, that being the over-whelming grief I felt standing between Jaimee and Lily as the nurses worked on Jaimee's bleeding and another nurse and doctor tried, what seemed to be futilely, to get Lily to breathe. Every time the midwife called out the number of minutes that had elapsed since Lily was born...3 minutes...5 minutes... I felt like a million tons of rocks were weighing me farther and farther down. When I couldn't stand anymore, I went to the corner and prayed. There's a lot more to the story, but just let me say that the tiny cry from deep down in a well was the most wonderful sound in the world.

Bless this young man and his family. I will forever be grateful to him for reminding me of what is important in life. For one, Lily has a chance to grow up and watch her big brother get ready for the prom, just like her mama and aunt Jaysa did so many years ago as Tori got ready to go to hers.

Shit Happens...Again And Again

I need to capture what's been happening so I never forget this "lost" winter. Seems just yesterday it was September...then stuff happened.

• Bill spent October, and one week in November, working in DC for headquarters



• when he got home we drove over to Albuquerque for Thanksgiving and drove home



• as soon as we got back, I flew to Chicago for Jaysa and Mike's baby shower



• in January Bill had to take 2 "week-long" trips, which shot that month



• Feb 6th I flew to Chicago for Ben's birth (waited..and waited...finally 17th he arrived). I got to spend some wonderful days snuggling his neck and cuddling with little Dee, then back to the real world.



• Feb 28th I flew home and the next day we threw a surprise 63rd anniversary party at the lake for Bill's parents, Jessie and Raymond (Mom and Pop)



• the next night Jessie had a mini stroke and spent 3 or 4 days in the hospital, then went into rehab for a week



• meanwhile, Lily was taken by ambulance to the hospital in Albuquerque and spent 3 days there then a week on oxygen (Bill and I drove over and back in a 5 day period to help with Lily and ended up cleaning Jaimee's old apartment she'd just moved out of)



• Mom and Pop decided to move to a retirement community to make their life a little easier since Pop had to give up driving (a 3rd accident on March 1st convinced us it was time)



• Tori died on St Patrick's Day. I flew to California and spent a week with Mom



• the day I got back, we started helping Mom and Pop move and packed up their house and put it on the market (this entails many days of U-haul trucks and trailers and 4-hour drives each way)



• we got back 1 a.m. on Saturday morning and de-cluttered our house over the rest of the weekend and will put it on the market this week (I'll be painting and fixing it up for the next few weeks while Bill goes to DC again and then spends a week aduiting offices in East Texas )

What I'm trying to say is, I really miss my nice quiet life. When I think of how yesterday was September and today is April...something...I wonder where my life went?

Another St Pat's Angel

Every time I've come to my blog to post since St Patrick's day, I see Tori's picture and quit. It's time to get past the painful side of that day and get back to posting.

On that note, here is Ben playing a St Paddy's troll. If you ever had a troll doll, you will remember how their hair stuck straight up and their eyes stared at you...recognize the similarities? He's the cutest little troll in the world and it's not only his mother who thinks he's charming!

Saint Paddy's Angel

My little sister Tori was born a month before I turned 18, making me old enough to be her mother. She was born with beauty, grace, and a mischievous smile that made your heart go soft when you tried to be angry with her. She often made me feel young and old at the same time, and seldom could I keep from cracking up if she went to work on me trying to make me giggle. No matter how old we were, I could never stay mad when she was around.

Just a few hours ago, we got 'the call'. You know, the one you never think you'll get. The one you pray will never come. The one that only comes out of the blue and hits you like a ton of rocks. Those type calls never make any sense...this one least of all. Tori is gone. All I can think is... how can that be? I always thought there would be time to get together and rid ourselves of past grudes. Now all there is is the past, and it is not what I would like it to be.

Back in the 90's, when she and my sister Becky were well past 21, the two of them would show up at my apartment with bottles of beer. I wasn't much of a drinker then or now, but the two of them didn't mind if I drank coke while they had a beer. So we would be at the table laughing, with a bunch of empties on the table, and our mother and step-father would drive up. "Quick" Tori would say to Becky, and she and Becky would slide all the beer bottles in front of me! Louie and Mom would walk in the door, and there I'd sit with a bunch of empty Sam Adams piled up in front of me, while Tori and Becky appeared to be sharing a Coca-Cola. Mom never bought it for a minute, but somehow Tori thought Mom believed that I was quite the drinker, and Tori loved to tease and joke me about it over the years.

It was often said of Tori... "She's no saint!" Heck, I said it many times myself.

But she looked like an angel most of the time, and I think of it as some sort of impishness on her part that caused her to leave on St Patrick's Day. And I will forever picture her with that little mischievous smile.

May God keep you safe now little sister. Your mother and the rest of us will do everything in this world to ensure your little girl knows how wonderful you are.

The Good, The Bad, And...The Ugly

While visiting Jaysa and Mike, I got a chance to see all sides of Mike. At times, he was as helpful as can be and ensured that pregnant Jaysa never had to lift a finger to get her laundry baskets up and down the stairs. Obviously, this is The Good Mike.

Then there was The Bad Mike, the one who tried to get Jaysa riled up whenever he could (which is easy to do when you know how to push her buttons...or... when she's driving).

Back in December, when I was there for the baby shower, Jaysa was driving and didn't realize her lights were off due to the bright whiteness of the snow. A police car with lights flashing pulled us over, took Jaysa's registration and license, then let her off with a warning ticket. After that, whenever Jaysa criticized Mike's driving, Mike would laugh at her and call out "raise your hand if you haven't been pulled over by a policeman this week!" To which, everyone in the car except Jaysa would raise their hand and touch the roof.

To me, Bad Mike is almost as funny as Billy Bob Thornton's character in Bad Santa.







Then there's The Ugly Mike. There are no words needed to point out that Mike would make a very ugly chick. Mike gave us a flash of girly style when he was rounding up wrapping paper and bows from a session of gift opening.






Need a close up of this lovely look? Yeah, I heard that gasp from you!

When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Take A Roadtrip

Last Friday we got a call from Jaimee about Lily being hospitalized for breathing problems due to a respiratory virus. Luckily "Gampy" Bill was supposed to be on travel this week, but it was cancelled last Thursday, so he went in to work on Saturday afternoon and was able to clear his schedule and take this week off. We jumped in the truck Sunday morning and drove all day, getting to Albuquerque on Sunday night just after Lily was discharged from the hospital and allowed to go home on oxygen.

It was stormy weather on the way over, but towards the end of the trip a big rainbow lite up the sky toward the north. I got a feeling that all was going to be well with my world...Gampy was snoring from the back seat, a CD download of a broadcast from Coast To Coast AM was playing on the stereo, and I knew exactly where to find a little pot of gold!

Here's Lily today, feeling much better and wondering how she can slip out of this oxygen tank contraption?

Like Father Like Son

Jaysa and I made fun of Baby Ben's toes, especially how his big toes seemed to be twice as big as his other toes. So Daddy Mike had to whip off his socks and claim paternity. As you can see, Ben got his toes from his daddy.

I have heard that nature ensures that fathers can find their babies by making the baby look like the father for the first year or so. Obviously even if Ben is upside down in a hole, Mike will be the first man to run over and pull him out.

How To Take A Picture

Back when I was trying to take a good picture of myself, I tried to show Bill it was the camera that took bad pictures and not myself that was the problem. He seemed skeptical, so I shot a couple of shots of him to prove my point.

Damn, why does the camera take good pictures of him, but not of me? I'll have to work on this.

One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other

Look real good at the faces in this picture and guess who may have passed a little wind?

The New Arrival

After an all-nighter and 3 hours of pushing with no progress, the doctor encouraged Jaysa and Mike to have a C-section. Mike and the baby were sent to the nursery where I was able to get the first picture of Baby Ben through the nursery window.

Here's some shots from today after he's been able to gussy up a little and get a feel for all the new faces staring at him. He's 7 pounds 12 oz with the longest big toes ever. Of course he's adorable.

Grandma Nancy held his feet while I snapped some shots of those toes. He balled them up before we got a good shot, but his big toe is twice as big as his other toes on each foot.

Mom, Dad, and Baby are all doing well. Sister Dee is staying with friends and has quite a surprise when she gets home.

Baby Watch Day 11...Last Day

Jaysa's laptop died yesterday, so that's why you haven't heard from me. We're at the hospital. They say a picture is worth a 1000 words, so here's a fortune of them... Jaysa is looking perky in the first, but then it goes downhill. The last is the clock showing the time they gave her the epidural. More to come. To quote Jaysa when Mike asked her how it was, she said "Birth...with the constant feeling you want to pee and poop and the contractions kicking in? Is this the best mother nature can do?"

Valentine's Day or Waiting Day 9

So even though his wife is 9 days overdue and pees every 10 minutes, Mike is still the romantic who smuggled home a bouquet of flowers last night and hid them in the closet until this morning when he surprised his lovely wife with them.

He even asked her to "...be my valentine again?" It was very heartwarming to witness.

This old lady was wishing I could have a do-over with Bill. Years ago he sent me a beautiful box of long-stemmed red roses, but I soon taught him to not waste money on flowers. Maybe I should not have killed his romantic streak so throughly. It sure was nice to witness this 11-year tradition with Jay and Mike.

Meanwhile, we're on day number 9 of the waiting for baby game. And, when I say "we" of course I mean poor Jaysa is doing the suffering while Mike and I are enjoying watching her waddle around.

Calendar Girls

Somehow the dogs in this family are better dressed than the humans. Here's Dee sporting her Christmas gear and looking really happy about having to wear it. In fact, if you could read her mind I think it would be x-rated.

Next up is Bailey girl sporting next month's Easter outfit. Once again, happiness does not ooze from her dismal face. Unlike Dee, who only thinks bad thoughts of her humans, Bailey probably gave many four letter huffs to her slave Jaimee.

While the girls chose holiday gear, Mr. Wrigley obviously prefers a more laid back approach to life. From the photo below, it appears he's ready for vacation. Of course, he deserves it after the year he's had watching over his new baby girl.

Tale Of Two Lilys

This is the year our family gained two new members, both named Lily. They kind of resemble each other in a happy-go-lucky, always smiling way. Baby Lily came first, although Doggy Lily is older.

They both have big grins and lots of pretty white teeth, and sometimes they stick their tongues out. They also tend to crawl around on all fours, but this similarity might be ending soon as Baby Lily is learning to walk and get around pretty well.

Unfortunately for Baby Lily's family, she's at that stage where she likes to be the center of attention and can't understand why anyone would want to ignore her and play video games. Doggy Lily already has the maturity of motherhood and is more of an equal to the adults in her family, therefore she takes a more sit back and wait attitude. Doggy Lily was adopted by Jenny after she had a litter of puppies. Lily must have felt really mistreated when she had to watch all her little ones being given away and then end up being given away herself when her original family couldn't keep her.

Jaimee also adores her Baby Lily, although the word "mistreated" could never be applied to Baby Lily. As you can see, she is the princess of her castle and her lowly subjects are no longer safe from her grasping clutch.

You don't have to worry about Doggy Lily either. She has settled in and is part of the family now. Her mother, father and brothers all adore her, and she will never have to fear losing her new family as she has become their princess too... and is working on becoming the queen!

Who's Your Daddy?

Ben, today is your due date and the first thing you'll see is the face of your Daddy. I was thinking you may wonder who he is. Well, first of all we have to discuss your Mama. Mama likes to take it easy and eat chips. She always has and always will. That's why your Mama was smart enough to pick your Daddy for her husband. You see, your Daddy is the active one who will make sure you get your share of the adventures in life. He does that for your Mama and everyone he comes in contact with, and he will do that for you.

Your Daddy is not one to sit around and play bongo drums and explore his navel. Nope, that's not him.

He's the one that gets everyone up and dancing by leading the conga line!

He knew someday you would join his life, and he knew he had to prepare as best he could. So here are some of the things he's done to prepare for you.

He's learned to talk baby talk...

He's explored the ocean to make sure it's a safe place to take you (and obviously he's checked his goods along the way to make sure he was protecting them as best he could for your conception)...

He's practiced being the disciplinarian by keeping the younger family siblings in line...

He's practiced being a cowboy so he'll be able to tell you stories of cattle drives and nights beneath the stars until your old enough for him to take you along...

He's wined and dined the older siblings, not so much because he enjoyed it, but so he can be on the lookout in the years to come for family members who might try to be a bad influence on you when you're in your late teens

He's put on a few pounds during the pregnancy so your Mama didn't have to. It was a sacrifice, but someone had to keep the bad stuff out of the kitchen!

No man wants to be the only male at a baby shower, but he was a champ. He joined in and pretended that he'd rather be there than out playing a round of golf with your Grandfather. I even heard him try to guess the answer to a game or two, now that took real courage with all the women calling out their answers as loud as possible.

He's almost worn a path in the carpet practicing pushing your stroller, so I hope you get here soon.

You can't ask for a better father. He's all prepared as you can see...

...and Ben, you'd better hurry because poor Dee can't take much more of this!